Review #63: My Inner Life aka Fuck My Life (Post 5)

Part 2

Story by Link's Queen

Review by Warnuts

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The Final Fight

Can it be the final chapter.

       I charged forward, crying


into the chilling air as I prepared to strike. Lunging, my weapon clashed with his, causing a crash of metal and a shower of sparks.

I swear to me she just copied and past that from the last parragraph.

Pushing forward, our weapons met again, as a shower of sparks rained from our rage. I backed up again, raising my weapon for another assault. We moved in a circle, each waiting for the other to attack. Then I took my chances and lunged again. This time my weapon connected, cutting his black tunic, leaving a gash across his chest. Looking down at his crimson soaked wound, he sneered then flew at me, sword raised. I ducked, raising my weapon in defense.        Our blades connected again, sending another shower of sparks into the air.

Okay not even in the cheesiest action movies do sparks fly this much.

The sound or our weapons clashing filled the room, as the water rushed around our shuffling feet.

Wait shouldn't that be ice?

He again tried to push forward, causing me to block in defense. Backing up again I moved with him, trying to anticipate his next attack. And I felt him surround me. His taunting laugh causing the rage inside me to flourish. Then I felt Link calling to me in my mind,

No Link stop that, do not save her.

heard him telling me what to do. But because of the fiery rage that was running threw me, his voice sounded muffled and distant. As the evil being moved around me, I felt the chilling air he was generating move across my skin. I eyed his every move, waiting for the right moment to strike. His blood red eyes watched me, the flames of a fire seemed to flicker in them. His weapon moved with such grace and his moves like that of a striking tiger.

So are we supposed to hate or like Dark Link.

        Though I waited, waited for the right moment. "Well aren't you going to attack, or are you afraid?" Dark Link snickered as his hand gestured for me to come forth. "Afraid of you!?" "Your more of a fool then I thought." "You surprise me Dark Link." "I thought you said you were going to show me just how rough you can play." A small smile crossed my face as I saw the burning rage twist Dark Link's face. "Be careful of what you wish for." "Cause you might just GET IT!"

Okay who the fuck said what?

Dark Link's face twisted into a vicious smile as he lunged forward again. Raising my weapon again, I prepared to defend myself. A sudden flash of metal blazed as my weapon met his. Using all my strength, I fought to push his sword back. My wrists started to buckle under the immense power that Dark Link was putting into his sword,

Gee it's like he's as strong as LINK.

 as he tried to pin me under it. I felt my heart starting to beat faster, felt sweat beading my face. I continued to push forward, forcing my all into my only hope, my Phoenix Circles.

       "Your weak Jenna." "Why don't you just surrender to me and I will go easy on you."

Or, you kill her now... Just sayin

 "The hope your holding onto is not going to save you now." Dark Link said bitterly, thrusting

Go on.

his sword forward, pushing it closer to my throat. "You infidel!"

For those who don't know if  an infidel is "a person who does not believe in religion or who adheres to a religion other than one's own." So I can think of a couple of reasons for why that won't work.

  1. Jenna clearly believes in the the mythology of Hyrule.
  2. Dark Link isn't subscribed to a religion
  3. even if he was their is only one religion (and thats to me)

"I will never concede to the likes of you!"

Oh look a new addition to the list of movies she has to stop watching.

I spat, my eyes narrowing. "Then die bitch!"

       With a swift move of his sword, Dark Link knocked my Phoenix Circles out of my hands,


sending them flying across the room.


With a gasp, I backed up only to be met by a swift kick to my legs, sending me crashing to the floor and sending a spray of water into the air. I watched as the twisted figure of Link loomed over me, sword pointed at my throat.

Stop playing just the tip and kill her already.

 With another sinister laugh, he grabbed me by the tunic and threw me across the room,

No stop that, that just gives her time to think of a way to kill you... Or free Link. One of the two.

sending me flying across the water and into the twisted tree. With a loud thud, I fell to the ground, stunned and hurt. Trying to shake off the pain I was now feeling, I opened my eyes only to see Dark Link, advancing on his counter part.

       With one last look back at me, his blood red eyes flickered with and evil glow as a sinister smile crossed his face. "Nothing is going to save both of you now." His chilling laugh filled the room again, causing it to ring in my ears. Dazed, I looked around the room and saw my Phoenix Circles just a few feet from where I sat.


I tried to get up, but my leg was hurt badly, so I fell back down. Trying to drag myself, I got with in arms length of them, when a sudden flash of metal knocked my weapons further away. I looked up and saw Dark Link standing over me. "Ah…ah…ah…I cannot have you retrieve your weapons now can I?"

Do you mean the weapon you left on a table for her to retrieve? Also why didn't you wait untill she almost had it then cut off her arm?

He said in a sinister laugh as he waved a finger in front of him. "Now get back to where you were!" He said as his foot connected me in the jaw,

So there is a couple of ways you could of said that.

Just sayin.

causing me to fly back into the twisted tree. "Now stay put this time, I will be back for you shortly!"

How well did that work for you last time. Also maybe you should have taken her weapon instead of leaving it their. Hell you could have just killed her!

 He screeched as he turned and strode back towards Link.

      Lying there I felt my whole world starting to fall upon me. Its hopeless." I thought to myself as I huddled against the evil looking tree. "I failed miserably." "I failed Link." "My son, Link Jr." "What have I done?" "Its all over now, I failed them both." Burying my head in my hands, I started to cry. I felt as if I betrayed both Link and our son. Now our son will be orphaned, Link and I prisoners to this twisted evil being.

We get it you're going to die just get it over with.

As I thought there was no hope left, I heard a distant voice call out to me in my mind. Suddenly the void opened up and a flame rose in my mind.

Gees what a... Hot head.


Haha up top.

No... just no.

That was terrible.

Get your shit together Walnuts.

Kill yourself... I need more bodies.

Shut up warnuts

Yellow one more outburst and I'll have you watch Time of the Rapture.

 As the connection between Link and I was established, he called out to me. I floated in the emptiness, moved towards the flame.

Please be the flames of hell.

 I saw Link's image dance within its red glow, as his voice called out from it.  "Jenna my love, you cannot give up, you cannot give in." "But he is just too strong, what can I do?" I said to him telepathically.

Thanks for telling us that, I thought you were yellig this across the room.

 "My love, search for the strength within." "Look into your heart and there will you find the answer." Then the void shattered around me, causing the flame to flicker out and our connection to break.

So is Link dead?

       Suddenly I felt something hot surge threw me.

Hent stop fucking the characters

It raced threw my bones, raced threw my every vein, radiating to the very center of my being. My skin felt like it was burning,

Napalm will do that to you.

 as if I was in a fire and the blood within me felt like it was boiling.

Oh shit she opend the Eighth Gate.

A sudden burst of pain shot threw me bringing me to my knees, my screams filing into the air. I felt my hands starting to burn, and as I looked down at them, flames were dancing on the palms of my hands.

So she now has either a new triforce or she now has magical fire.


       I screeched as the flames rose into mini fires, its heat making sweat bead my face. The heat inside my body surged towards my hands,

Wouldn't that kill you?

 fueling the fires. And I felt a wave of blinding heat surround me, as my eyes watered. As the fires raged threw me, I felt something within me snap.

Your ribs.

Instincts of a pure fiery rage burst threw me,

What happened last time you were filled with rage, oh thats right you almost died.

as an unknown fiery wind lifted me up surrounding my within its flames. My hair whipped around my shoulders and my dress whipped around my ankles as a  scorching wind started to fill the room.        

       Standing inside the mists of a hellish burning blaze my eyes narrowed as Dark Link suddenly realized what was going on. Just as his hooded head slowly turned to face the fiery hell that was looming over him, my hands rose as tunnels of fire shot out, snaking towards Dark Link with a burning vengeance. When the fiery hell connected with him, his twisted cries tore into the air as the fires engulfed him.

Oh no what will he do in a rom filled with water?

As I moved forward, the air begun to fill with a crackling sound as lightning danced across the ceiling.

And now she's the Avatar.

 The water in the room began to surge, creating a rushing of waves as the water pounded the walls. Then the ground started shaking, causing cracks to appear on the walls and small crevasses to open in the floor.

       I watched as Dark Link's sneer shone threw the hell that engulfed him. He dropped into the swelling waters, dousing the fire, causing heated steam and smoke to rise from his charred clothes. "You wretched bitch!" "I should have killed you!"

No shit, I've been telling you that for a chapter now.

 He cursed, as he rose from the water, his face twisting into a devilish sneer. "You're right, you should have killed me when you had the chance." "You're a fool, now its time to die you evil beast!" Raising my hands into the air, I summoned my powers and combined them into a fiery hell as it descended upon the shadowy evil while lightning and fire reined on him from the sky. The water surged beneath his feet as the floor shook under him, causing him to collapse to the ground. I watched as the Dark Link screamed, trying to fend off the hell that was upon him. But it was useless.

And i've been fighting off this hellish story.

       As the attack continued, I gracefully moved over to him. Lifting a hand up, I cried into the air, the sound piercing the howling noises cascading threw the room. And with all my strength I called upon my new powers combining them all into a gigantic energy ball of pure destruction.

And now she knows the spirit bomb.


With a flick of my wrist, the energy ball descended upon the Dark Being, engulfing him. With his last screams of agony, the energy ball imploded taking Dark Link with it. The chair reaction from the explosion sent me flying backwards and into a wall.

So what she is saying is she is stronger than Link.


 Lying on the floor in the water, I looked around the shattered room and saw the elements still raging. With my last ounce of strength, I raised my head up high as a blinding white light ascended from my body and filled the room causing all to go calm once more.

So much bullshit in one part of a story.

       When I awoke, Link was sitting beside me, holding me in his dusty arms.

Woah woah back the fuck up, why is Link free, and why are his arms dusty?

 Looking up at him, his eternal blue eyes stared deeply into mine. "Your awake my love, oh goddesses I thought I lost you!"

I was praying he did.

"How are you feeling?" He said as he stroked my arm. "Ouch…oh my head hurts." I winced when I tried to move. "Take it easy my love, you landed into a wall."

No shit, if you look nine lines back you'll see that she just typed that.

 Rubbing my head I felt something cold and wet. Lowering my hand I saw blood on my fingers,

Why is her blood cold, they're a couple of reasons on why that shouldn't be. First our bodies are 98 degrees so naturally blood is warm. Second she was on fucking fire!

then the sight of the room caught my eye. "Oh my Goddesses…….what the hell happened here!?"

Are we really supposed to believe that she got amnesia .

 I said in a raspy voice. "You don't remember?" Link questioned. I just shook my head.

        "While I was bound to the wall,

This bitch better not retell the entire fight scene or I will destroy Rays laptop.

Oh come on I'm not even in this part.

I watched helplessly as Dark Link sent you crashing into the tree that was there." "When you tried to regain your weapon, Dark Link caught you and kicked your weapon away, then kicked you back into the tree."

Ray stop trying to hid the laptop.

 " The next thing I knew, you were standing in the center of the room, your body on fire." "Then I felt a strong searing wind fill the room as pillars of flame shot out from your hands. " "The last thing I remember was that all hell broke loose and a strange ball of energy engulfed Dark Link, destroying him." "Those haunting screams he let out before he died, I swear I will never forget that."        


I got you!

Thanks hent.

Not the first time this has happend this week.

"When I awoke, I was lying on the floor covered with dust and debris." "I begun to look around the room for you, and when I found you, you were lying on the floor unconscious and covered in blood." "I thought my worst fears came true, I thought I had lost you."

Can you please just die already.

I watched as tears welled up in Link's jeweled eyes. He leaned forward and held me close. Closing my eyes I laid my head against his chest, listening to the beating of his heart. I was still over whelmed, by what Link had just told me. I had no memory of those events.


 "Did I really have control over the elements?"

I have a feeling that the next chapters will be like this.


 I thought to myself. "What really happened here?" "Did I really cause…..this?"

Yes you did write this story.

 I glanced around the shattered room in disbelief. "How could I have caused such destruction?"

With a computer

Lowering my eyes I looked at my hands again. Aside from the blood that was caked on them, I saw nothing on them that could have let me "Shoot Fire" from them. With a sigh, I looked back up at Link. "Link my love… can we go home?" With a smile he nodded as we got up and slowly made our way out of the strange mangled room.

Yeah don't go to a doctor to see if she has a concussion

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