For the sake of my sanity and the safety of those around me, I'm going to be taking a little break from this. Probably not too long, just enough to get back to my roots of, well, stories that are actually good on their own merits. In the meantime, Warnuts, Martin, and I finally got around to this story. We've known it existed for quite some time, but pretending it didn't was so much easier.
AUTORES NOTES: this is an twilight fanfictive.
Oh, we’ve reviewed plenty of fanfiction, but this is the first time I’ve even heard of a fanfictive.
it is to be based on requestion from someon from tris site. please enjoyed readed ANT MAKE MORE SUGGESTONS!
I have a suggestion; stop writing fanfiction.
CHAPTET 1: ZOMBIES ATTACKS EDVARD!
I hated the books, reading this is going to be torture.
You read the books? Wow. Deserve more credit than I thought, didn’t realize you read.
After Twilight? Fuck reading.
edvard vas goes on the place near where vas beles house home and he lokeded at to the sunfall and say "this is twiligtening and somethnig goinna happened soon but what" he sayed to noone because he had bad felings of it all
juts then HE SAWED ZOMBIES!
Fuck fuckity fuck fuck, that was one hell of a sentence.
"we eat yous edvard cules"
Are the zombies talking? Please tell me the zombies aren’t talking.
and edvard cullen sayeded "you can tryed to do that" and katateed thems in theirs hearts!
Destroying their hearts wouldn’t kill them, but it’s still full of win.
BUT THER WAS MORE ZOMBIE GUYS THERE TOO!
"we wills eated you!1" the zombes yelled to edvard bud edvard used his vampire superpowars to killed thems but ther vas too many zombie guys so he has to runned to oter place!
Such description. Very wow.
"oh no they is gonna kill belle too noooooo! then edvard sayed. he woulds have to find help soon before things is too late!
CHAPRER 2: CULLEM FINDS HELP OR DOES HE...?
cullen vas now runs to some place and hads to go find himslef some help so he snaked into the airplane
I’m tired of these motherfucking holes in this motherfucking plot!
that goed to bulgeria.
Is it really that easy to sneak onto a plane?
he had heared the rumours taht lived there in a place called transilsvasia there and had to go see if true OR BELLE IS BE KILL BY ZOMBIES!
So did he just leave her behind? With the zombies? I see nothing that could go wrong.
he knoked at the door of the tranvilvasmia castle and dayed "is anyone inside on the castle" and dracula openwed the door and sayed to edvard cillen "i am darcula who is you
Me Edvard. You Vampire.
and edvard cluen saeyed back to at tse him that "i is edvard culen and im vampie too nad i need yours help to defeated te evil zombie guys who want to killed my girlfried" and darcula sayed "come in castle!"
and edvard foolowed too
then dracula taked him to the gun room
Oh, he has one of those too?
where vas guns stoled from bulgerian army guys!
"there guns should be helped us" edvard asked from dracule but dracula sayed bakk to the him: "yes it vill but you musts make sex wit me or i wont not help you!"
Anything to add Martin?
Wait for it…
it was vas ulgy to make sex wit man person but he had to save belle so he remraked "okey lets do it" and draclue droped his rope to the ground!
I feel like rope was a typo, but I suppose it still works.
then they start to kiss and they has sex for 6 house and it GOOOOD!
Is six house longer or shorter than a bananosecond?
CHAPTER 3: THE FINLAL PART
So is this the last part or not?
Please dear god yes.
edvard cullem and draculla then goed back to teh gum room
What about Belle? Is after sex gum just that much better?
and taked msheen guns and lazers
What was the Bulgerian army doing with lazers?
And why are they in the gum room?
“How descriptive,” said no one.
and put them to theirs bags but there vas not no time to thinked
There was no time to thinked in this story.
beacaus the zombie gyus hhad foolowed edvard!
"WHAT HAVE YOU EVIL BAD GUYS DOED TO BELLE?" EDVARD YELLED IN ANGRY!
"we rapped her
and killed her and eated the bloods! HAHAHAHAHA!" AND EDVARD VAS RAGE!
Is his W key broken? Come on, type two Vs at least.
edvard killed thems wit dracullas guns and then sayed craying to darclua "i kill them all but belole is still gones! and dracula comfortsed him and sayd "but you is still have me!"
“No, fuk u ugly man person!”
so edvard jumpswed to to his arms and they make sex again and all vas tobe happy!
Yay, rebound sex!
Nevermind the zombie apocalypse.