Review #159

Walter White and Sly Cooper Team Up

Story by THE PETE PETERSON EXPERIENCE

Review by Fluff




Chapter 1

Breaking Bad Sly Cooper: Walt and Jesse Teams Up with the Cooper Gang

I don’t know about you Ray, but this story is making me think about a story with Jim Carrey and wrestling...any idea?

 

I think the connection is pretty obvious.

Chapter 1 Jesse Pinkman

walt and jesse we're smokin some killer green at the white family basement playing nba25k15.

Wait a minute, are we reading the actual Breaking Bad screenplay right now? These two are so in character that I almost couldn’t tell.

It’s almost like we’re reading the deleted scenes to an episode.

"oh look at this! DUNK SHOT MOTHERFUCKER" walt said.

Yup, “DUNK SHOT MOTHERFUCKER,” Walter White’s famous catchphrase.

he was blazed wikked deep. his eyes were red because he was smokin so much killa green.

When did Snoop Lion replace Bryan Cranston as Walter White?

"yo this is bullshit mr white whi are you so good at the video gaming and shit bitch?" jesse said.

Okay, that dialogue isn’t too far from his actual dialogue.

he was getting owned like a bitch.

This dialogue isn’t too far from his actual character either.

"you see jesse i know a lot about sciense so i trigger thant into this here video game ya see?" wal said with a wink on his face.

 

he was in his underwear

As always.

but he had a t shirt with his face on it and it said heisenberg under it because he made his own shirts and shit on so it's not gay to be with him his best friend jesse pinkman.

Yeah that was a good sentence, 10/10, really nailed it.

 

I feel like Jesse x Walter is already a thing but he might just do it anyways.

walt was lying though he was using cheat codes to beet the system and fuck with jesse's head.

So he is the villain!

"mr white your so smart bitch its just not fair!" jesse said. he took a hit from a bong that was attached to a huge ass fucking generator that got him higher than the sky

Aim for the moon, and you’ll end up among the stars. Alone and cold and die alone.

[Editor’s Note: Joke stolen from Cyanide and Happiness.]

if you undastand me.

I do understand you….and that’s what scares me.

"yo i'm gonna go home and plow jain because that's something i'm actually good at bitch!" jesse said. he went out the door and ran away.

"JESSE!" walt said.

"WALT! get the fuck up here. NOW." skyler said. she was a bitch. the audience booed because fuck skylard.

So Breaking Bad is now a sitcom starring Snoop Lion as Walter White. I gotta say, I’m impressed.

Hey Pete Peterson, Charlie wrote you a song.

"what the fuck do you want skylard. get it?

Ray, Martin, is it geddit finger time?

 

Alright in 3...2...1

 

 

 

i'm calling you skylard because your fat you fucking cow." walter said as he got some cheers.

I’ll admit, I do like the idea of an obscene sitcom. But let’s get Doug Stanhope to write it, not Pete Petey Petelord Peterson.

walt came up. he was eating a greasy and creasy cheeseburger and it was getting in his creasy and greasy old man chest hair.

Man Walt, you’re one big fat fucking cow.

he was sweatring because he dindn't want ot pay the heat bill no mo.

As someone who has actually watched Breaking Bad, Walter has literal fuck tons of money, he could pay a fucking heat bill. Or air conditioning bill as this is what he would need to pay.

"do you see it? DO OYOU SEE WHAT OUR SON IS DOING?" skylar bitrchd at walk.

Is he trying to find a plot? Because if he is, I think we should go help him.

walt put took his louey vatton dsunglasses off and saw walt jr. he was on the table and he was fucking a plate of pan-cakez and bacon and eggz.

Was he using lube?

he was using maple syrup as loob.

 

Now that’s what I call a good morning breakfast.

"so that's where all the mayple sirrup is going." walt said with a big ass grin on his face.

"WALT what the fuck? OUR SON IS HAVING SEXUALL RELATION SHIP WITH BAKON? DOn"T YOU SEE WHAT IS FUCKING WRONG HERE. WALT?!" skylar yelled at walt.

I never would have thought Skyler was such a Baconphobe.

Yeah Skylard, check your privilege.

"god just shut the fuck up already." walt said as he kicked the table.

The same table his son was having sex with his bacon…..what are we reading again? Where is Sly Cooper? Where is the plot?

 

he was mad. then jesse came in thru the window as the audience cheered.

Yup, sitcom neighbor tropes confirmed.

"yo mr white i forgot my marawanna pipe." jesse said.

 

he had a big ass pipe under the table. it had his face on it. he was smiling. like on his pipe but he was also smiling becauzew he fucking found it! they were both smiling ok.

 

"WALT IM TIRED OF U EATING THE MARAWANNA OK JUST SSTOP WALT. WALT." skylar said.

"yo like quit being a bitch, bitch." jesse said. walt laughed so hard he peed his underpants and had to get a new pare.

 

but it was a special pare. it was underware but it had a sleivelss shirt attached.

So a onesie?

 

Well if I wasn’t scarred before.

it had his face and dimonds and shit and jewlry. it was part of his fly and fresch as fuck clotching line like called HESIENBERG cloths.

I couldn’t read a single bit of that, but I can already tell it’s disturbing.

it was legit as fuck.

Disturbing and legit as fuck as well.

"gotta love my heisenberg swag." walt said.

 

"mr walt im sad let's go to a whole new world where like there are half human half animals and shit that'd be dope.

 

I mean, it would be pretty dope.

I just wish that exist" jesse cry and cry

"Jesse don't be said." walt said as he hugged his buddy. "I discovered that very place in college with a portal. lucky for you i tsill have the means to make portal."

 

You have been smoking too much killa green Mr. Peterson!

"YOU MEEN IT" jesse said cryingly

walt flipped a switch and the kitchen was now a computer room.

 

walt hit the doo dad with his dad dong (cuz he's a dad get it)

First finger bitches

 

 

┌∩┐(◣_◢)┌∩┐

and a portal showed up.

I think we can all agree that The Pete Peterson Experience is a master at not giving a shit.

"this is it"

"nice portal" jesse said. it was cool.

"let's leave this world behind. OH WAIT"

"what is it mr white I hope we can still go to animal world"

“Yeah, we can, but only if we do everything one hundred times. Everything. I mean, is that still worth it?”

"oh yes jesse. we just need to pick an animal to be."

"I wanna be a cat." Jesse said immediate. "I thought about dis for a long fuckin time."

"okay I'll be a wolf cuz there fucking cool."

Alright then, give me more of a reason to make this a Fluffy Review.

 

We have no standards so that’s some pretty damn low standards.

walt gave jesse a scientifik magic potion and they both drank their own, jesses drink was red and walts was purple.

Red and purple and furries, where have I seen this before…

[Editor’s Note: One image ago.]

Can we sue?

"let us go to...the animal kingdom." walt said

 

and they jumped through the portal, transforming intot he animal people they drank the potion to become them.

"it's like...a whole new world." jesse said.

Okay, Animal Kingdom...a whole new world? Stop ripping off Disney!

he looked down at his hands, which were now paws. he was covered in pink fur now and was a cat. walty was a blue wolf.

jesse cried and cried because he was so happy.

"jesse we're here. the animal kingdom." walt said. "bitch."

No, you’re the bitch now, Jesse is a pussy.

"thank you mister wait."

meanwhile, hank had to go get something from walt jr.

Maple syrup?

he walked into the living room where skyler was crying really fucking loudly. like if you were her neighbor you'd be fuckin pissed because fuck she was being loud.

hank walked up to her. she kept cryin. he decked her with his right fist and knocked her down, then threw her out hte glass window.

 

"that'll shut the bitch up." hank said.

Yup, I’m convinced; this is the script for an actual episode of Breaking Bad, they just forgot to shoot it.

"I wonder where walty is."

he wasn't in the houe (because he was in the animal kingdom).

Wow I would’ve never guessed! What an amazing shocker!

hank didn't know that last part.

he looked around and saw the portal.

"ok" hank said as he walked inside.

Oh yeah, that’s exactly what I would say and do if I saw a fucking portal in the middle of a room, “ok” and immediately walk into it. What? That’s not what a sane person would do?!

At least take a picture and post it online first. That way if you disappear forever because of your dumbassery, people will at least know what happened.

walt was in trouble. you wanna know why he was in even more trouble? later on, skyler followed him inside, and so did walt jr.

 

uh oh. uh. fucking. oh.

Hey Ray, that’s exactly what you say when we find a new My Immortal story.

Yeah, I have a problem. Those ripoffs are such blatant trollfics, but they’re just impossible to ignore.

next time: sly cooper gang meets walt.

Chapter 2 sly meets walt

Oh, can I take this moment to bring up the cover art for this story?

 

Walt just… he looks so sad.

I feel bad for the guy, he’s stuck in a horrible fanfic and can’t do shit about it.

Breaking Bad Sly Cooper: Walt and Jesse Teams Up with the Cooper Gang chapter 2

"Bently"

a/n: fuck infamooooos so fuckin rad SHIT. only thing that woulda made it better is some COD stiyle multiplayers

Sly, bently, and murry were sitting on the couch playing infamous: second son.

This review was brought to you by Infamous: Second Son

murry sucked at it so they let sly play.

"sly we have to turn on the news im checking google inbetween jackin it to porn not gay porn you dicks but like whoa something is going down" bently said.

That whole entire sentence could’ve been shortened to “We need to turn on the news, I’m on Google, but I’m also looking up porn.”

Or even, “Sly I’m out of ideas for a lot, let’s see if anyone else has something.”

sly flipped him off but bently had a reblote that changed the channel so sly died in the game.

"FUCK"

Do these characters ever do anything but swear and hit each other and call each other gay? Because this is the second Sly Cooper story I’ve read by Pete x100, and all I’ve seen them do is swear and hit each other and call each other gay.

the news came on. there was a video of a portal.

"shit this looks like a big fuckin deal." muggshot who was the news dude for some raising/

“Shit this looks like a big fuckin deal” - understatement of the century.

 

"oh fuck sly they opened a portal. we better go investigate." bently said.

"why" sly said. he really wanted to get dat trophy

"there might be cool stuff to steal." bently said.

"ok" sly said.

"ill stay here" murry said.

"fuck off mury you can't play my ps4." sly said, and kicked murrys nutsack and testicules.

iz funny bcos violense

Pete Peterson forgot to mention that he did it 100x times.

they left as murry cried in pain and followed after them because they needed him to drive while they kept gaming in the backsteat. they played titanefall now and it was pretty fuckin rad. if they like combined titanfall and infanous thatd be cool.

Can this still be considered fiction? At this point I think it’s just Petemeister telling us disconnected things that he thinks are cool.

then they got to the portal.

And that was pretty cool.

flakes were falling out.

Snow...flakes?

"sly dont eat those!" bently screeped sticking his neck out long as sly stuck his tung out.

"why hte FUCK not."

"i think they are remnant of a forgotten place that will kill youuuuu." bently said.

wut

"oooo."

"Fuck." sly said.

"you ate one didn't you." bently said.

"maybe" sly said.

"well did you or didn't you"

"I said maybe is that not enough"

"no"

"why"

"Fuck Bently, perhaps I may not fucking remember"

"but sly"

 

IF HE FUCKING ATE ONE HE’D BE DEAD ON THE GROUND!

"nnnbut snnnly" sly said funny making fun of bentlys geekie voice.

"you just did it."

"alright fuck I ate one okay shit."

/SlysLife

"youre gonna dy sly unless you get the cure."

When did Bently become an expert on fucking portal snowflakes?!

"actually your not." a mean voice said behind them.

it was a wholf and a cat that showed up. but like you know like people too like the way sly is.

Anthropomorphic? No, you know what, I take that back. That word has way too many syllables for Pete-san.

"who are you." Sly cooper said.

"I am walter white." walter white said. "but you can call me hysenberg."

Master of disguise.

"ok"

"sly doesnt have a nickname" murry said. "Hes not cool like you."

Nicknames of Sly Cooper

-Ringtail

-The Thief

"Mr uhh white BITCH what do we do now?" jesse pinkman said.

Wait, Jesse doesn’t have a nickname. Is Jesse not cool?

"we need to explain to these "bitches" jesse that the flakeys from the sky are harmless."

I’ve been trying to tell them that, but these bitches don’t listen.

"ok" jesse said. "now what"

"well...now what?" walt said to the gang.

they stared at each other for longtime. something wass gonna go down.

 

"let's fucking get high as shit." walter white said, throwing a bag of weed in front of sly.

So like Skyler, this whole cocaine business just went out the window.

Can’t argue with the bag of weed though.

sly sniffed it with his good nose

¿

and he was suprised how good it wuz.

"shit this is good. let's go."

If Carmelita Fox becomes a DEA agent I’m quitting. 

they went back to the hideout and were frends now.

"so you guys are uhh fuckin thieves bitch? that's pretty fuckin cool." jesse said.

"yeah. and you guyz make drugs?"

"we do a lot of stuff." walt said. "maybe we should partner up."

“There is absolutely no good reason for us to do that. So yeah sure why not?”

"okay." bently said. "you and me can work on science

 

and you can help sly with everything else."

"yeah bitch! fuckin sweet!" jesse said.

"On one condition." walt said, putting his hisenburg hat on. "the hippo goes or we dont work with you. he looks like a fat gay faggot retard and i don't want him to roo-in my hizenberg swag."

 

"well then sorry guys i guess the deals off" murry said.

"fuck you murry get the fuck out of here." sly said.

"yeah!" bently said. "Fuck you and your stupid mother"

murry cried and ran away his heart was broken. walt jesse sly and bently blazed it up and played titanfall and infamous all night

 

-elsewhere-

hank schrader woke up in an office. he looked in a mirror and was really scared because he was not human anymore and shit. he was like a rabbit

But wait, didn’t Jesse and Walt drink special potions to become anthro? Why would they even bother if the portal does it for them?

Maybe it was liquid weed.

"hello. you might have some questions. but before that I need your help." someone said in the darkness.

"help with what. what hte hell am i" hank schaper said.

"you are part of the animal kingdom now. but thats not important."

Oh look, that was almost a joke.

a lady hand slammed on the desk.

"two of your worlds biggest criminals broke in and are now working with my worlds biggest criminals. we are going to fucking rip out their organs and display them on the town square so no one can ever fucking do crime again or they'll be fucking with our shit. my name is carmelita fox, and I will fucking murder anyone who breaks the law. no mercy. no scope.

No Scope.

one bullet."

That’s almost like -

 

I...I mean...that’s nothing like the real police.

Officer Action to the rescue!

hank looked at carmelita. she was really hot. he wondered if he could have a wife and a girlfriend.

Could or should?

"so what do you say...partners?' carmelita said.

all he wanted to do was find walter white, his brother in law. if he could catch big criminals it would be cool too.

How’d that work out for you in the series?

 

"okay" hank said.

Chapter 3

Breaking Bad Sly Cooper: Walt and Jesse teams up with the cooper gang 3

BBSC3

Huh?

bbsc3

Oh, Breaking Bad Sly Cooper 3, now it makes perfect sense. I sure am glad to wrote it twice.

Chapter 3: "Walter White"

a/n: this is the chapter when they really start to get shit done.

Oh, like shit hasn’t been done already?

walt and sly and bently and murry i mean jesse not murry beause they ckicked him out in the last japter.

That sentence went off the rails so fast that we didn’t even get to the first clause’s verb.

they stayed up past their bedtimes and pulled an alld nighter!

 

Gettin shit done.

they stayed up drikning lots an klots of monster energey.

High school: NOT EVEN ONCE

I’ll have you know I drank nothing but the best.

they were all really high and would just NOT stop smking that killa khronic. there was asmoke all overed the city!

Did Cheech and Chong write this?

and it was coming from the cooper hidw out!

"this video game pretty fun, bitch" jesse said. sly wwas checking his facebook account.

"guys i'm gonna make a status about the next crime we're going to make but i can't thing of any letters?" sly said. he was mad blazed.

Your stupidity is preventing you from doing something stupid.

 

"you racoon fool! you racoonish fucking foool you" walter said. he stood up and crumbs of cheesty poops

 

roled down his greasy and creasy shirt that was cova'd in greasy creasy cheeseburger sauce and some of his own sauce.

 

"don't you see what this doing?" whalter said in a loud voice. he put his hands up right away.

"if you post about are criminal acktivity on the internet this whole thing will be fucked! do you not know the first rule of scrime!" walty screamed at them.

Make sure you’re not high while committing it?

"mr white do not do this yo! mr white im gonna cry." jesse said. he got scared when walter yelled in his mean scary voice.

"yesse do not cry. you will not crying when we are getting millions of money. we will pull off the big heist! we will break fucking bad! we will do a lot of things! we will steal things too! and make meth!" walters said.

Yes! Add that to this!

now sly jesse and bentley were insprired by what walter whit was saying. he knew a lot about science.

 

especkially the sciense of krime. jesse was now crying tears of happy not tearz of afraid.

We still are very much still crying tearz of afraid.

walter put on his heisbenberg hat and smiled at bently sly and jesse. they were about to break bad for real this time!

"walt! walt! walt!"

We get it, he said wait one hundred times, move on.

sly jesse and bentley said. walt joined in..

"walter white! walter white! walter white!" walt sly jesse and bentley said. they danced aroud da room and show they meant fucking business.

Dancing intensified

then a portal open up.

Again?

in the cooper room living room. skylar came out of it! but she wasn't an animal. person. even thogh she wuz in the animalz kingdom and everyone there was half human half animbal.

I can’t wait to see how the story explains itself.

"yo mr white what is your bitch doing here?" jesse said. he wasn't krying anymore.

"i don't know. jesse. i just dojn't fucking know. i know shes a bitch which is why she didn't transform! SKYLAR IT IS ILLEGAL FOR HUMANS TO BE HEAR!" walte siad.

Oddly racist, but also I get it.

"mr white im scared," jesse saidy.

"jesse do not cry tears of mad now. what are you doing here skyler you fat cow?!

If Walt hated Skyler so god damn much then why the fuck did he marry her?!

DO YOU SEE WHAT I AM DOING SKYLAR! I AM PROVIDEING FOR MY FAMIELY!" walter screaminged.

You say that, but all you’ve done is use drugs and play video games. At least in the show, he was legitimately trying to provide for his family, even if it got out of hand.

"walt come back to the humanw orld walt. i'm yelling at you this right now. you cann't provide for our family in hear walt, its time to go back to the real whorld!"

Well at least one person has some common sense. I think Skyler might be my favorite character in this story, she get’s constantly shit on by the other characters but ends up being the smartest.

I know the feeling.

Shut up Yellow.

skyler said in a mean bitchy voice at walter.

"no." walter said all cool. he dropped his heisenberg hat in the dut.

"walt you cum back right now." skylar said. she looked at walt in a mean ugly way.

Hey Fluff, how do you think Petersburg feels about Skylar?

Kinda the same way Ebony from My Immortal thinks of “preps”, very negative without any reason or thought.

"no you bitch." walter said.

"walter please. i'm crying tears on my face for you." skylar said.

Where the goddamn else would you cry tears from?

she pointed to her face as she cryed. she was faking sad though. she just wanted walter back so she could be a bitch to him.

"no." walther said.

"walllllllt." skylar said.

So Mr. Pete, here’s a fun fact; by presenting a situation that’s annoying to the characters, there’s a good chance that you’re also presenting a situation that’s annoying to the readers. In the right context that’s not a bad thing, but when your whole story has been nothing but annoying, it just gets so much worse when it’s intentional.

Can this even be considered intentional? I could sleep a lot more easier if I knew this was a mistake...a terrible horrible mistake.

then sly whacked her with a cane and she fell back in the portle. she was bleeding a lot.

I guess it was Sly who was the one who knocked.

"AHAHAHAHAHA GOOD ONE BRO!" walt said as he gived sly a high six because they had hands and then their tales.

Walt went from a seasoned and cold-hearted cocaine smuggler to a drunk college frat boy.

Thus is the beauty of FanFiction.net.

it wasn't gay ok?

Why does Petetete need to clarify that everything isn’t gay? Kinda gives off some gay vibes.

Like a certain furry story.

Hey man, at least I embraced the fuck out of it. Two fucks out of it, actually.

Fracture is 100x better than this crap, no doubt about it.

I agree and I don’t even like Fracture, so what does that say about this?

[Editor’s Note: Fluff and Ray are talking about review #155! See review #155!]

then they heard policez sound outside.

"OH FUCKING NO BITCH." jesse said.

"oh my god no." sly said. he was scared he was about to fianaly get caught! because he stoled a lot of money.

"arrest! come out with your handz up in the air!" carmelita said. she got in.

"you big dummies." angend hank scharter said.

"you really think this will work do you walter white?" carmelita said.

Think what will work‽ We’re in the third chapter, and I’m still not sure that the characters even know a plot is happening around them!

"how do you know my FUCKING name?" walter said. he really wanted to knowe.

"we know a lot about you walte.r

you don't belong here walty. inspecktor focks is going to help sned you back to our world tbhe human world. ylou fucked up the law here walty your going to be in jail for a long fucking time." hank said.

Oh and you assaulted my sister (Skyler) who I also did, but I don’t give a fuck.

"you will be under arrested of the law for making meth!" carmelita said.

“You’re under arrest for making meth even though you’ve been smoking weed throughout this entire story”

"and you little shit sly coopeur. i'm just gonna wahck the shit out of you for stealing because that's not against the law too!" hank said.

Not against the law?

 

he took out his gun and his badge.

"how did you know we was here." bentley said slow.

“Also, where are we? This scene has not been set whatsoever.”

he wanted to fuck with their headz.

"you dummies wer smoking too much mairnhaiuna and there was a lotta smoke in da city." cartemelia said.

"ohhhhhh." sly said. he drank some beer.

"DRINKING BEER IS NOT LEGAL HERE TOO YOU MOTHERFUCKING FUCKER!" hank said.

Well then, I’m crossing out going to the Animal Kingdom from my bucket list.

he tryed to shoot at sly. but sly was too fast and hit hank with his cane and really bopped him on the head.

"owwie!" hanked said as he falled down.

Owwie...the sign that this was written by a 2nd grader…

 

This actually looks weirdly similar to something I wrote in fourth grade. Not in terms of plot, but in terms of style. And if it weren’t for the fact that this has been Peterer’s writing style for the seven years he’s been on FanFiction.net, I would totally believe that this was written by somebody in elementary school.

…………….you wrote something similar to this in the fourth grade?

 

"RUN AWAY" walter said. they all ranned into the cooper van and drove away. they were getting chased by a lotta copz.

"oh no oh my god." bentley said.

"oh my gosh bentley stoping being a bitch. fuck the police!" sly said. he took out a rucket luncher and blew up cops.

Where was that upgrade in the video games?

now sly and walt and bentley and jesse were really under arrest of the law for killing cops!

 

"we need to steal things! fast!" bentley said.

Why?

Why?

he was right.

Why?

Why?

"you are right.

WHY?

Why?

Why or whatever. I’m totally still in this review btw.

we need to pull of the biggest histe." sly said.

"and we need to cook a lotta meth. right now!" walter said. he got into his underwear and they started cooking as sly and bentley stole a lot of things because that was their job because they they where theeves.

I think petE might be over simplifying these characters’ motivations.

walter and jesse sold the meth and made a fuck load of monney.

"we break bad!" wlat and jesse said at the same time.

It was a title, not a ducking catchphrase.

"and make steal!" sly and bentley said.

"WE KICK ASS!" walt and jesse said.

"we fucking rule!" sly and bentley said.

"we ARE THE COOPER BREAKING GANG BAD!" sly water jesse and bentkey said at the same time and high fived at the same timee.

I would of rather went with THE BREAKING COOPER BAD GANG, but both are still incredibly stupid.

"but how are we going to get awayed from teh fuckong police?!" bentley said.

You had time to make meth and sell meth and steal things. At this point, the police are just annoying more than anything.

"leave that to me." walter said as he made a weird wrinkly face with his forehead.

walt pressed a button and the cooper van flew into space.

 

“And if you look out your left window, you’ll see that we’ve jumped every shark in the Pacific Ocean.”

away from the cops! they were all mad but they just couldn't catch walter and jesse and the cooper gang!

Good. The Cooper Breaking Gang Bad wins. Wish them well in outer fucking space.

"we done did it!" bentley said in a weird voice.

"yeah we pulled off tha biggest heisty haha." sly said. he was high again.

As was Pete Peterson.

"what do we do now mr white" jesse said.

"we stormed the castle and KILL the ANIMAL KING SO I CAN BE THE NEW KING OF THE FUCKING ANIMALS" walter said.

 

Chapter 4

Breaking Bad Sly Cooper: Walt and Jesse Teams Up with the Cooper Gang

Chapter 4 Sly Cooper

a/n: i don't even know what im soposed to fucking put here.

An interesting fucking story, it’s not rocket science.

 

"no! fucking no" sly said.

"you can't and you can't!" bently screamed.

"you can't kill the fucking animal king. he's the king of us animal people." sly said.

"don't kill the fucking king!" benetly saids

You can go after any king, but you cannot touch the Fucking King. I am unkillable.

Hard to argue with Mr. Super God Boss King Man.

   

"and who is going to stop me? hm? look at all the bad we broke on this day that is today." walter white said when he put his hands in the air. he smiled and laughed an evil laugh. then walter transformed back into human! he had a green shirt. he wasint in his fucking underware yet! he pressed a button in the space van that made them go back to earth. i mean animal earth. the fucking animal kingdom was where they was.

 

What the fuck am I even reading at this point.

"mr white...no..." jesse said.

"how could you do this to me?" sly said as he groumped his kane.

"ha-haaa! you thought i was gonna brake bad with you? nuh huh I broke bad AROWND you. withing you. at your fucking soul." walter said.

Okay, just because the show is called Breaking Bad DOES NOT MEAN IT IS SOMETHING THAT THEY FUCKING DO!

he laffed evully more and grabbed a fairy that wuz flieing around and crushed it to you show sly and the gang who was just bently he meant fucking business.

So can we all acknowledge that even the writer doesn’t care at this point?

sly and bently started to cry because now they were very scared of heisenberg ( walter white)

This may very be the first Fluffy Review I give up on. This story went from a shitty story to a terrible story to a story that puts My Immortal to shame.

There’s just no substance. At least My Immortal had character. At least My Immortal tried to tell a story. This is just… what is this?

I get the idea of trollfics, as a reviewer it’s almost a given to have an understanding of what you’re reviewing, but this, this is a story written by someone on meth.

"and i will steal your money to buy me all the evil gadgets and wepons i need! hahahaha. i am betreaying you like glue! fuck you! " walter said as he flipped off sly and bently who were still scare.

"wate why are you not an animal people like us no more?"bently said.

"i was just pretending but youi retards belived me. besides i fucking HATE animals.

FUCK THIS STORY! I’M DONE!

 

all fuckomng amimals which is why i will be your new king and you will all be meth slaves bitch." walter said with an devious ass look on his goddame face.

"mr white no. fuck youmr white! i wanna be an animal bitch!" jesse said as he bitch slapped walt and spat in his face.

"grrr jessy! why are you so fucking stupid? don't you see how much meth i will sell to both animals and jhumans!" walt said.

"no bitch." jesse said with a mad look on his face.

"jesse! we would be making this much money!" walter said as he waved his arms around to show stacks and bricks of cash and cheese they be makin becaue they be blowin hella chedda.

"mr white its not about teh fucking money. i lvoe animals yo. these are my family. i wanna be an animal forever and if you dont like it bitch then fuck you back!" jesse said and he flipped walter off. this really pissed walter off!

"FINE! fucking fine i'll take over the animal kingdom on my own and you little bitches can't do shit to stop me. i'll eat you up! i hate animals but i shure do love fuckin eatin them! mm yum" walter said. he took out a nife and fourk and wented to sly and bnenetly and jessey.

"u wont be eatub anywon with that mouth you faggot." sly said as he bopped walt on the head.

"ow that hurts" walt said. he took his clothes off and took a sword out of his pants. he was in his undwerwar! now. he ran to fight the animal king. his sword was made out of meth btw

"someone gotta doo somethin" bentely said wavin his arms around and making googly eye

"we gotsta stop heisenberg or my name is not sly fucking coper which it is." sly said.

"but how bitch" jesse said. he was really scared about what walter was gonna do!

"we gotta brake good not bad. because walter is very fucking bad." sly said. but it waws almoast too lait.

walter was running acrouss a feeld to the castle and was killing all of the animal king's guards. he was slicing them up with his fucking meth sword. they had to stop him they just fucking had to.

"we gotta stop heiensenberg like now like ok sly?" bently said. they got in the cooper van and bent pressed a button. it turn into a robot. it was actually a transformer that transfoarm from a stealing van to a robot van. it was a van with a roboto on it. sly was in the robot and bently was driving with his vomputer. jesse was a fast kitty so he was running nechskt to the van and they were going like really fast to stop waltere but he was running too fast for them to ketch up.

walter saw them and just new he had to stop them but how. he took a banana peal out of his underware and througwh it on the grownd. it made the robot transmorfer van flip over and crash! bently and sly got really fucked up and then he used his sword and pointef it at jesse and turned him back human!

jesse couldn't run fast no more because no more was he a kitty cat animal person!

"no fuck you mr white just no." jesse said as he started to cry. walter shot a beem at jesse and he was in his underware just like walt!

"haha now your just like me. comeon jesse. jesse. jesse! join me again. or meet me to kill the king. choise is up to you pal but your in your underweare like me because you arere a fucking bad guy like me" walter said as he laffed and fired up a gruppling hook to climb the lion kingz castle.

jsee pinkimnan was crying .he was having a shitty ass day. but then it got worse.

"arrest with your hands human!" it was carmelina and special angendt hank schardler!

"oh no we about to be dead" sly said. it looked bad for the cooper gang. and for jesse too!

"were fuckinty fucked." bently said,

Breaking Bad Sly Cooper: Walt and Jesse Teams Up with the Cooper Gang

chapter 5

Chapter Title: Skyler White

PREEVEUSLY ON AMC'S BREAKING BAD SLY COOPER:

"""""

"no fuck you mr white just no." jesse said as he started to cry. walter shot a beem at jesse and he was in his underware just like walt!

"haha now your just like me. comeon jesse. jesse. jesse! join me again. or meet me to kill the king. choise is up to you pal but your in your underweare like me because you arere a fucking bad guy like me" walter said as he laffed and fired up a gruppling hook to climb the lion kingz castle.

jsee pinkimnan was crying .he was having a shitty ass day. but then it got worse.

"arrest with your hands human!" it was carmelina and special angendt hank schardler!

"oh no we about to be dead" sly said. it looked bad for the cooper gang. and for jesse too!

"were fuckinty fucked." bently said,

"hahahahahahaha" walter white said as he run

"""AMC"""

"""#BreakingBadSlycooper""

"put you're hands in the aire and ima gonna arrest em like i just don't fucking care" hank said. he took out a gun.

he put it at sly cooper bently and jesse.

"arrest!" carnelmia said.

"where the fuck is walty?!" hank said. he took out another gun and aimed them closeleed at sly and bendly head.

"WHERE" caermlia said.

"WHERE THE FUCK IS WALTY?!" hank screamed as shounted. he had a vary scery voice. it was louder when he yell'd.

"idk!" sly said. like he actually said the letters. cuz dat stud for i dont no but you typed in idk on the interent.

"your braking too much bad!" hang said. and he said it loud again.

"inspektor shrayder. stop it now! theez are my kriminalz. i will put them under arrest of the law not a bitch ass like you!" caemrlia said. hank stepped the fuck off. he was mad now but she was right. they were here griminals.

"arrest! put your hands behinde your backs and im going to send you to jail for stealing!" cemria said.

"no please don't i'm sorry i stole so much baby plz dont do this to me." sly said as he made a crying face. he took his blu hat off and put on a blue monster enegery flatbuil hat on so at least his swag on now.

"sorry racoog. you're fucked." carmelia said.

"no you are." hank said. he took out a gun and shot her in the head and blood blusted out at sly jessy and bently.

"mmm tasty." benty said as he got some of her blood in his mouf.

"shad up!" sly said as he whanked bently in his head in his cane.

"i'm sorry boys i had to do it. it's ok i can bring her back." hank said.

"buhuhuhuhuhhuh" sly said. he cried. even tho real men never cry. but when they specsial ladee die well shit that the time to cry.

"you killed slys girl you ass whole." jesse said.

"yeah." bently said.

"i loved her and i would do anything for her." sly said.

"but now she dead." hankums said.

"yeah i guess you're right." sly said.

"i loved her too bitch. she was a hot fox." jesse said even though he was a human again.

"hey only i can love her me sly cooper." sly said and he pointed his kaine at himself and did a cool spin with it.

" istil love her but ok bitch. she dead anyway." jesse said as he made a serius face. like you know that face he makes on the show.

"boys its time to take down walty. i know his plang. he's gonna kill the animal king become the first human king of the animal people and make them his meth slaves." hank said.

"ok." sly said.

"ok" bently said

"ok bitch." jesse said.

"but this is the partd you don'd know. after walty takes over the aninimial kingdom he will open up the portaul and take over the human world. i know i don't like it." hank said. he took a gun out and dropped it. and took another one out.

"oh shit what we gonna do bitch?:" jesse said. he was crying because he was scared.

"we gotta get to the tower." bently said.

"you're right?" sly said. they saw walter in the distance and he was climoing the tower pretty fucking fast. like if you were there and saw how he was climbing you be like damn dude that dude made be old but he can clime prtett fucking fast.

"theres no more time for waiting. only time for now is clombbarring waltty fuckin white." hank said. he took a gun out. he also gave jesse a suit. it was like an iron man shirt but it was yellow. it was a suit and it had powers. and it had wheels. like ferrary wheels so he could go faster. he also had machine gun hands and seats for sly and bently to ride on him because also a rocket man.

"wowee zowee bitch." jesse said as he look at his robot rocket man suit hands. he shot beams out like eyern man.

"lets fuck shit up." hank said. he gave sly and bently guns and took a gun out and shot up in the air to scare walt.

he flew up the tower and got to hte top where the animal king and walter were. hank grew a prouplleir out of his head like a hella copter and flew out. it was something he made for himself.

"you faggots are late. late to the extreme." walter said. he was still in his underwear and had a big ass meth sword. he was smoking weed out of a bowl shapedl ike his head (a/n i got a pic of that bowl on da it siiiiiiick and swaggy as hayl)

jesse lookad at him with that face he makes and smoked two joints at the same time.

walt smiled.

he cut the animal king's head off!

"NOOOOOOOOO" sly bently jesse hank said.

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" walter said as he put the animal king's crown on and the sky turned black and walt turned blue like his meth and got really big. like he was godzilla or some shiz but he was really walty but blue and really big and he had a crown on because he was the new animal king!

"yoiur not walter white anymore your heseingerg! jesse said.

"yer gosh darn right." walter said. he looked at hank.

hank taked out his gun a lots he takes twoguns out, drops them and got 3 moares

walt stepped on him and squasked him like a bung!

"NO!" jesse said.

THINGS things were not looking good for sly bently and jesse. and hank because he was dead now. so was carmelita.

""NEXT TIME ON AMCS BREAKING BAD SLY COOPER""

"mr white this is crazy yo. just stop bitch please." jesse said.

"hank and camerlia ate dead." bently said.

"i wanna cane walter white in his face." sly said.

"fuck yeah." murry said.

"walt." skyler said.

"i am the king of the animal peoples!" walter said.

"""AMC"""

"""#BreakingBadSlycooper""

"""""

""""

"""

'

And all of them died, the fucking end.

A perfect, shitty way to end a shitty story.